If you are the kind of guy that isn't concerned with appearances, this list is for you. It is, in essence, a gadgety fashion guide for guys that are secure in their geekyness. The list includes everything from Wi-Fi detecting garments to crazy laptop privacy hats—all guaranteed to repel women and popularity like the plague.

Wi-Fi:

Wi-Fi Detecting Shirt: The Wi-Fi detecting shirt can pick up 802.11b/802.11g networks and display the signal strength via your chest. Available for $30. [Think Geek via Link]

Wi-Fi Detecting Sneakers: Designer Stefan Dukaczewski's ASRD shoes are actually a modified a pair of Nike Dunks that serve as a foot-activated Wi-Fi detection system. A pressure sensor in the heel turns the system on, and any Wi-Fi signals detected within 150 feet will light up small LEDs located on the flap of the left shoe. [ASRD via Link]

Wi-Fi Watch: Rounding out the list of Wi-Fi detecting duds, this watch detects signals and displays the strength from 0 to 8 at the push of a button. Available for $35. [ThumbsUp UK via Link]

Glasses:

Vuzix AV310: If you don't mind headaches or looking like Geordi La Forge, Vuzix claims that their new AV310 goggles are the first video eyewear to offer a true 16:9 widescreen experience (the equivalent of a 52" screen viewed from a distance of 9 feet). Available for $250. [Vuzix via Link]

Gunnar Optiks Eye Strain Glasses: Hey! Backstreet's Back! These glasses from Gunnar Optiks claim to reduce computer-related eye strain by "improving eye focus, reducing glare and blocking artificial light." I'm usually skeptical about products like this, but these claims may actually have some merit. Available for $100-$200. [Gunnar Optiks]

Pants:

Peripherals Pants: These concept pants by designer Erik de Nijs feature a built-in keyboard, mouse and knee high speakers—offering geeks the perfect opportunity to touch themselves while surfing the darkest corners of the web. That is what I call multitasking. [Yanko via Link]

Jackets:

Scottevest Scott Jordan Signature System: The SJ system from Scottevest is actually two jackets in one: The "Quantum" outer shell and the "Fleece 5.0" liner. Together, it offers an absurd 52 pockets to hold your gadgets and gear. The pockets are also transparent and touch sensitive so you see and control those devices through the fabric. The Quantum outer layer is also waterproof and windproof with sealed seams, removable hood, pit-zips, removable powder skirt. Available for $340 (components can be purchased separately). [Scottevest]

Hats:

iLogic Sound Hat: The iLogic allows you to ditch the earbuds and listen to your music through speakers built into the hat itself. The cord plugs into standard MP3 players and can be tucked away into the lining when not in use. Available for around $28. [iWoot]

Gloves:

USB Heating Gloves: I know the weather is getting colder, but if you want the respect of your co-workers, it is imperative that you avoid wearing gloves that warm your hands using USB power. That goes for any other USB clothing as well. Available for $25. [Perpetual Kid]

"Other":

Body-Laptop Wooly Jumper: I suppose it goes without saying, but if you don't want to look like a tool, this is exactly the kind of garment you want to avoid. Sure, it will keep your head warm and offer privacy while using your laptop in public places—but at what cost? Fortunately, the Body-Laptop jumper is only a concept at this point. [Link]

It opens with a flick of the wrist and lights with a turn of the flint wheel, and the “truly windproof flame” sways as the device is moved back and forth.

Apparently, the idea is to allow fans to experience the famous “Zippo Moment,” by holding an iPhone/iPod Touch aloft and “swaying to power ballads at concerts.” The application also features realistic sound effects, selection of designs to customize the skin of the lighter, as well as an animated flame that, thanks to the iPhone’s built-in accelerometer, reacts to movement of the device.

Interested? It can’t hurt after all. Here’s a link to the AppStore from where you grab Virtual Zippo Lighter.

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Standing at 4 feet tall and 150lbs., this life-like Darth Vader Statue can be purchased for a measly $18,000.

Any hard-core Star Wars fans out there? (Now my question is, how many people will buy this in the next week?)

Sculpted by Lawrence Noble, the inspiration for this Vader bronze came from a source usually associated with the Star Wars prequels, that is the planet Coruscant. Standing 4 feet tall and weighing 150 lbs., this majestic statue sports a particular attitude as it is frozen with one foot raised on a little precipice. Only 30 such life-like bronze Vaders are available for a colossal amount of $18,000 each.

via bornrich, Product Page

Brought to you by: Zedomax.com

$18,000 Darth Vader Statue!

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Canon 200DG Digital Camera Gadget Bag (Black)

The Smoker’s Umbrella is the perfect device for those who want to take a puff even though it is pouring cats and dogs out there. It boasts a clip-on ashtray so that you will still be able to get your nicotine kicks in without dropping ash by the sidewalk. I suppose you’d also equip yourself with a Zippo or some other windproof lighter if this umbrella is your choice of anti-rain cover. It will retail for approximately $20, coming in a cigarette-shaped tin to complete the look. Makes me wonder why there is no built-in lighter or a compartment to store matches?

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The Smoker's Umbrella is the perfect device for those who want to take a puff even though it is pouring cats and dogs out there. It boasts a clip-on ashtray so that you will still be able to get your nicotine kicks in without dropping ash by the sidewalk. I suppose you'd also equip yourself with a Zippo or some other windproof lighter if this umbrella is your choice of anti-rain cover. It will retail for approximately $20, coming in a cigarette-shaped tin to complete the look. Makes me wonder why there is no built-in lighter or a compartment to store matches?

Permalink | Comment | Uberbargain | Uberphones

10. At number 10, the Golf Simulator is a must for your fat wallet. When I have enough money, I am gettin’ one of these in my gigantic garage.

9. The golf ball mouse and mousepad are pretty good sign you are a golf addict.

8. Of course, golf doesn’t always cost a lot of money. With little creativity, you can create your own golf hole for putting in your house using a single Pringles box.

7. Yes, you can get theese autonomous golf cart robots, a lot better than carrying your clubs or pushing that ol’ golf cart around. Then again, you can “jump” over stuff with these things…

6. The RC golf ball is a great gadget for playing tricks on your partners when you play for some serious money.

5. Windproof Umbrella is a great umbrella for those windy courses where winds can reach up to 30-50MPH.

4. Golden Tee Golf is a classic golf game you must have regardless of how many great Wii golf games you have.

3. Heart rate monitor watch is a must if you are serious about monitoring your heart rates during intense competition.

2. Pop that putt out of there and get your money on your next putting bets.

1. Of course, you can’t miss out on making one of these golf club POVs I invented couple years back.

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Photo [Marco Giardini/Flickr]

Smoking is a lonely pursuit. Ostracized and persecuted, the smoker must resort to a five minute exile in a drafty doorway if he is to calm his temper and top up the treacly cancer coating on his lungs. The list of countries and states outlawing the devil weed is growing relentlessly, although with one curious side-effect: the emergency exit of your local bar is now an ad-hoc singles club, and if you do manage to score, you can be sure that you won’t be nagged about your bad breath or poor stair-climbing skills.

With this in mind, we take a look at a few gadgets which will bring some joy back into the life of the nicotine addict, and at the same time placate the moralists who poke their noses into other people’s business.

Lighter

There are two ways to go here: Disposable or not. For the dedicated puffer, a Zippo might be the way to go, windproof and iconic as it is. More practical is the jet lighter, which shoots pressurized gas through a heated mesh. These will get you dragging down fumes in a hurricane, although they burn fuel quickly.

There is another kind of smoker, though. The one who is always promising themself they will give up. For them, a real lighter is too much of a commitment. Enter the Clipper, the Rolls Royce of disposables. Refillable and using replaceable flints, the Clipper is reliable and fairly environmentally friendly. It’s also a favorite amongst smokers of that other weed, primarily because the sparking mechanism is removable and very useful for tamping down the contents of a Blunt.

Available everywhere

Photo [wetwebwork/Flickr]

Portable ashtray

Smoking is messy. Tossing out that fag-end doesn’t seem like much, but if you live in England, it’ll net you a hefty fine. From July 1st last year, anyone dropping a butt faces an instant £80 ($157) fine. The answer? A personal, portable ashtray.

The Boodi is billed as an eco ashtray. It’s fully recyclable, but more important, it snuffs out cigarettes in seconds and seals to keep the smell inside. Looking like a small cigarette carton, the Boodi contains five tubes. Slide in the lit butt and the air is cut off. The cigarette is extinguished almost immediately and you can safely pocket it.

Product page [boodi]

Smoking Mitts

Alas, workplaces and public buildings no longer contain smoking lounges, which means you’ll need to head outside to the Singles Club to get your fix. Great in the summer, but come colder seasons you’ll need to keep warm. Normal gloves can catch alight and generally get in the way. You need Smoking Mittens.

The mitts keep your fingers toasty inside, but have a hole with a metal rim between the first and second fingers. You poke the gasper into the hole and puff away, suffering no discomfort except that in your lungs. £15 ($30).

Product page [Cocktail Equipment]

Another Portable Ashtray

This one is for the beach. Some forward thinking authorities actually give these away in order to keep the playa clean (Barcelona, Spain, is one). The conical shape anchors the ashtray in the sand and also provides enough depth to keep the sea breeze from whipping out the ash and scattering across the dunes. The cap shuts tight, so you can take it home or at least make it to the nearest trash receptacle.

The only suppliers I could find were Chinese importers. You’ll probably find them at your local novelty mug and t-shirt printing emporium, ready to be customized to look like an ice-cream cone and provide a nasty surprise for those screaming kids who keep running past, kicking sand in your face.

Cigarette Case

Whether a suave silver box for your Dunhill filter tips or a hand-tooled leather pouch for roll-ups, you need a case. It will keep your smokes in pristine condition and lend your coughing, short-breathed personage a touch of the debonair. If you’re not a smoker, consider replacing the contents with the U.N.C.L.E. Cigarette Case Communicator seen above. All the glamour, none of the danger.

If you roll your own, nothing is more frustrating (or less sexy) than a stack of separate bags for filters, papers and baccy. Grab yourself a tin, preferably vintage, and keep things neat. One thing: Never use a rolling machine. You’ll look like a wuss.

Now is your chance to castigate me in the comments. Yes, smoking is bad. And no, it’s none of your business, but I know that won't stop you.

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